Spitfire
by Capybara
Summary: OCRoy...or is it? A new colonel has come, and her name is Rain Spitfire. Hawkeye thinks that Spitfire is the most annoying person ever. Could Spitfire be competition for someone Riza didn't think she wanted? Stupid summary, hopefully good story. COMPLETE!
1. Prelude: The rain to come

Disclaimer: I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist. And that is what is wrong with the world.

A/N: Here is yetANOTHER RoyRiza fic that I just had to write. This storyemploys an original character, for which I apologize. I don't think I do those all that well.Also, I apologize, for the chapters may be short. Anyway, enough with the polite crap.READ this fic, ENJOY this fic, and REVIEW this fic.

Prelude

First Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye was, as usual, sorting through the paperwork that consumed a large portion of her life. It had been annoying at first, but she had gotten used to it. She'd had to. Finishing the latest report, Riza absently tucked one of her bangs behind her ear. It fell right back into place. What should she read now?

Flipping through the various piles, she came across one that seemed vaguely more important than all of the others that had the words "important" on them. Moments later, still holding the papers, she got up and walked over to her superior's office. The office of Colonel Roy Mustang.

"Sir, I think that you'll find this interesting," Riza said as she walked casually in the door. "Sir..." She looked over the papers in her hand and scowled. He was asleep. Again.

"Sir," Riza said sharply. When she got no response, Riza stopped. She didn't want to scream at him—if only because the whole of Central would hear her. What would be the best way to go about waking him up quietly? Usually, Riza liked the simple method of tapping him on the shoulder, but she felt like being slightly more creative today.

Maybe she should cock one of her guns. _That _was a sound guaranteed to wake up any military officer who had survived any sort of conflict. Riza stared at him. Roy was sleeping on a book that was open towards the final few pages, his arms acting as a pillow for his head. And he was snoring, if only quietly. In short, for a moment it was hard to imagine that this was the Mustang whose eyes were always ablaze with absolute focus on his goal, and nothing else. Riza found that she was staring at him, and shook her head to dispel any of the—feelings—she was starting to recognize.

Of course, that momentary drifting of her mind put the _very _self-disciplined Riza Hawkeye in a temporary foul mood. She quickly decided that cocking her gun was a sure-fire way to wake her sleeping superior.

It worked. Roy sat up quickly, eyes wide and hands already reaching for his special gloves that he always kept with him. Then he realized that he was not about to be killed, and immediately began to complain.

"Arg! Hawkeye! Someday you'll give someone a heart-attack, and if that someone's me, I'll make sure you get in trouble for assaulting a superior officer!" Roy exclaimed.

"Sir. Please calm down; I'm sure they can hear you across the building."

"I don't care. Now, what is it that you...interrupted me for?" Roy asked. Riza motioned to the papers she had laid on his desk. "Apparently a newly-promoted colonel is going to be staying here for awhile, a Colonel Rain Spitfire. It seems that she's well-known for her ambition and for being a very good alchemist."

She waited while Roy finished reading the full report. When he set down the papers, he remarked, "Very interesting."

"You've heard of her?" Riza inquired. If this Rain Spitfire was good enough to become a colonel at the age of only twenty-seven, Roy had probably heard about her. He always knew who his rivals were.

"Actually, I haven't," Roy admitted. "The Blackwater Alchemist...interesting..."

"Sir?" Riza asked dryly. If she knew her colonel, he would already be concocting a way to make sure Spitfire didn't get in his way. Either that or...

"I wonder if she's pretty?" Roy voiced Riza's thoughts exactly. Riza groaned inwardly. Of course he would be worried about her appearance. It was more likely that Spitfire wouldn't be the most appealing person; very few women joined the military, and if they did, they were usually very tough. Definitely not how Roy Mustang liked his women.

"You'll find out in a week sir," Riza said. Roy did not reply. He was already trying to fall back to sleep.

A/N: Okay, here's an extra-credit question. Where did I get Rain Spitfire's name? Becasue all of the military personell's names are themed, as is Spitfire's. Tell me, and I'll give you a cookie. A cybernetic cookie that you can't see or taste. But it's there. Yes, it's there...(okay, I think I just scared all of you away...but before yourun away, REVIEW!)


	2. Chapter 1: She's here

Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist. But then, you already knew that, right?

A/N: Yep. Here's another short chapter. And here's a short author's note.

Chapter 1

Riza waited at the curb for the car to pull up to the steps of the State building. Roy had sent her to be Spitfire's escort and guide to show the new colonel around. In a few moments Riza would be able to answer Mustang's question about Spitfire's appearance. She was of mixed feelings on the new colonel. The largest part of her suggested that Spitfire could prove to be a nice rival for Mustang, and even give him a challenge. Some of her suggested that Spitfire could prove to be a complete idiot, who had been promoted through not-so-legitimate means. And then there was one tiny part of her that said Spitfire could be very compatible with Mustang. Too compatible.

Riza was bothered by the fact that it bothered her that Spitfire was a woman. Normally she wouldn't really care—Mustang was a ladies man, but wasn't stupid enough to ensnare a fellow colonel. She hoped. That wouldn't fit in well with his plan to get promoted as quickly as possible. Riza's train of thought was broken by the car that had appeared at the steps. The passenger side door opened, and Riza immediately saluted Colonel Rain Spitfire.

Spitfire stepped out of the car, shut the door, and beckoned the driver off, all in one single fluid motion. Riza felt a little dread when she saw that Mustang's dream had come true. Spitfire was a tall, slender woman, with an extremely nice figure that showed even in the slight bagginess of her military uniform. Her eyes were a dark shade of enchanting blue, and her long auburn hair was bound up in a sophisticated bun.

Spitfire glanced at Riza and smiled—she had a perfect smile too. Riza could only imagine Roy's delight.

"First Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye?" Spitfire asked politely.

"Yes ma'am," Riza answered stiffly. "Colonel Mustang sends his congratulations and invites you to stop by his office, should you get the chance."

"Well, I think that should be the first thing I do," Spitfire smiled again. "After all, I'm sure that he's a very busy man."

Riza felt her temper slowly rising—something about Spitfire was really quite annoying to her.

"Very well, ma'am. I shall show you the way to his office."

Naturally, this took an eternity. All of the personnel that they met along the way had to be introduced by Riza to Spitfire. Riza had not known there were so many people in the building. Nearly a half an hour later, the two were standing in front of the door to Mustang's office. Riza prayed that Mustang was awake—that was necessary for a good first impression. She knocked on the door, and was relieved to hear a voice answer her.

"Yes?"

"It's Hawkeye sir. Colonel Spitfire is here."

"Ah, good," Roy said as he opened the door. Then he laid his eyes on Spitfire. Riza held her breath. This first meeting was going to be interesting. Roy's eyes widened, though that was only visible to Riza who was used to his bored stare. His eyes traveled down, then back up. Spitfire simply smiled her flashy smile. Mustang grinned. "Wow. Colonel Spitfire. Do you know how good you would look in a miniskirt?"

Riza felt her heart drop. How stupid was this man? To her surprise though, Spitfire laughed, a light bell-like sound that filled the air pleasantly. How annoying.

"Colonel Mustang, do you know how many men have asked me that?" Both of them started laughing. Riza did not see what was so funny. She did not join their laughter. When their laughing subsided, Roy beckoned for Spitfire to join him in his office. Riza was not sure if the invitation extended to her.

Almost as if in answer, Mustang handed her a folder, and said, "Hawkeye. Would you deliver this?"

"Yes sir—" Riza started. But Mustang had already shut the door. She stood there for a moment to get her anger under control. She wasn't quite sure why she was so mad. Obviously Mustang and Spitfire would be friendly, instead of arranging for the other to die, like some rivals did. But just how friendly?

"Oh, why do I care?" Riza asked out loud. Did she not trust him? Mustang wasn't stupid, and even when he took a gamble it was one that turned out with him on top. That was it. Riza walked off, focusing intently on her destination.

A/N: I will only say...REVIEW!(Because I'm a dog of reviews. Gotta have 'em.) Also, anyone have an answer to my extra credit question?


	3. Chapter 2: Washed aside

Disclaimer: Guess what? I don't own it.

A/N: Okay, this chapter is short too, and nothing much really happens, but I promise some interesting things are coming! Also,I'm afraid I was a little vague with my 'guess where Spitfire's name came from'. Allow me to clarify. Her first name and alchemist name have no real theme. However, her last name, Spitfire, does have an underlying theme. As does Mustang. Here's a hint: Only real Fullmetal Alchemist freaks, or history buffs would know it. Good luck .

Riza was aware that she was becoming rather annoyed with Colonel Spitfire, but she kept her feelings to herself. Over the weeks, Spitfire had proven that she was a decent colonel. She was always on time, was always prepared, and showed the proper respect to her superiors and subordinates. Of course that all changed around Colonel Mustang. When they were together, both acted like young adults who had just gone on their first date.

It was annoying. But Riza said nothing. Roy hadn't been this happy in a long time. Every morning, he had a little smile on his face, and it was not the usual smirk of "I'm going to take over this military someday", but a genuine smile. Riza was surprised to find that it hurt that she had not been the cause of the smile.

Riza went into Colonel Mustang's office just as he arrived, as she always did. She came to the office an hour ahead of him, and by the time he entered his office, she had already organized most of the paperwork for him.

"Good morning sir," Riza greeted when he walked in. Mustang muttered some sort of greeting to her, and sat down in his chair. He motioned for her to state her piece.

"This came in from General Airacobra," She began, placing the envelope on his desk. Mustang picked it up and nodded.

"I've been expecting this for a while," He remarked in a pleased tone. "But it means I might have to stay late..."

Riza waited a moment then continued with her briefing. She was nearly half way finished with it, when she heard the door open behind her. Riza, as she always did, simply continued talking. They would have to wait; Mustang never let anything interrupt his morning update. Sometimes it was the only thing that she could count on him to do faithfully.

"Hey miss!" Mustang called. Riza stopped talking. She knew he was talking to the person who had just entered behind her, and felt her heart sink. He only addressed one person in that tone of voice.

"Yes?" asked Spitfire innocently.

"Do you have a boyfriend?" Mustang asked.

Spitfire giggled. "No."

"Want one?"

Riza simply crossed her arms. She had gotten used to the mock flirting that Sptifire and Mustang engaged in so playfully, using more pick-up lines than she had ever heard in her life, not that that was many. She waited for Spitfire to say something like, 'I don't need one,' or 'You'd be too much for me'. Their pick-up lines were never successful.

"Why, yes I do," Spitfire replied. "In fact, I came here with the intention of telling you about this marvelous restaurant that a friend of mine works at. It's a nice fancy one, with romantic candle light dinners. My friend said she could give us a discount, if you want to come with me?"

Riza fought the urge to keep her jaw from dropping. Didn't Spitfire know what she could get herself into? True, it wasn't officially forbidden for two officers who were of equal rank to have a relationship, but it certainly wasn't good for one's reputation. And Spitfire had the nerve to ask him in front of her!

"That sounds wonderful," Mustang said, to Riza's horror. "Tonight or tomorrow?"

"Tonight. If you can get out early..." Spitfire twisted a piece of her auburn hair in her fingers.

"Of course," Mustang assured, "What about eight—"

"Sir," Riza interrupted, "I thought you were going to stay late tonight."

Mustang looked at her in surprise. "Oh. Hawkeye. You're still here?"

"Yes, sir," Riza said through her teeth. "I haven't yet finished my—"

"That's alright," Mustang waved her off. "I've heard enough for today. I'm sure you've got a lot more to do than hang around my office all day."

Riza couldn't say anything for a moment; she was too angry. Finally, she managed to salute stiffly, murmur a 'yes sir', and walked out to leave Spitfire and Mustang alone. Together.

She stormed to her office and slammed the door behind her. He had forgotten she was there? How could he _forget _that she was there! Riza was usually able to tolerate the fact that Mustang often forgot her contribution to much of his achievements; she was able to handle it, because she knew that he needed to look as good as possible to achieve his goals.

But he had forgotten she was there. That seemed to be happening a lot lately. Riza sighed to calm herself down. She had to admit it—she was jealous. It was official. Spitfire seemed to be everything that Riza was not—she was gorgeous, and it showed even through the drab attire of the military. She was ambitious; no one was a colonel at twenty-seven if they were not ambitious. She was an alchemist. Riza had never particularly wanted to be an alchemist, except for a brief childhood phase that soon passed.

Riza sat down heavily in her chair and slouched in a rather un-disciplined manner. There was no reason to be jealous. The only thing that Spitfire had taken away from her was Mustang's attention, which she had never wanted except for professional matters. So what was driving her so insane? Was it maybe that...she did want Mustang's attention for something other than professional matters?

She purged that thought quickly. Riza could not want him like that. It _was _forbidden for officers of different rank to have relationships, and the gap between first lieutenant and colonel was wide. Riza did not deny herself the fact that Mustang was entirely too attractive. She had figured _that _out the moment she met him. But she had long learned to ignore her physical wants—or so she had thought. Spitfire was forcing her to confront a plethora of emotions she didn't want to deal with. Riza forced herself to start working. She could never have him, so there was no reason to drive herself insane with envy of Spitfire. She should simply be happy that Mustang was happy, and forget that she felt anything towards him. That was what she should do.


	4. Chapter 3: Day lilies

Disclaimer: I own nothin'.

A/N: Yay! Here is another chapter! I'm writing this as fast as I can because I've got such great reviewers! I apologize that all of the chapters have been so short lately, but this one is a little longer, and I swear they will continue to get longer! So please enjoy!

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

By noon, Riza had worked so hard that she had almost forgotten about the annoyances of the morning. Almost. There was still small sense of anger that nagged in the back of her mind. She did her best to ignore it, and focused entirely on her work.

She had decided that as long as Mustang was happy, she should be happy. No matter how hard that was for her in this particular situation. Riza glanced up from the paperwork and was surprised to see that it was past her lunch break. She had missed it. Oh well, she wasn't hungry anyway.

"Hawkeye," Mustang said, suddenly appearing in her doorway. Riza looked up in surprise.

"Sir?" She asked. Good. It looked like he was back to work, and as long as Spitfire wasn't in her line of sight, Riza did not rekindle her bitterness.

"I need you to go pick something up for me," Mustang handed her a slip of paper. "Here. Go to this address. I would do it myself, but I've got some things to catch up on."

"Of course," Riza saluted as Mustang left, rather hurriedly, she noted. Riza did not even look at the address until she had put on her overcoat—it was the beginning of spring, but winter still refused to die entirely.

The piece of paper was crumpled from being thrust from her hands to his, and when she unfolded it, she saw that Mustang's hand writing was quick; almost illegible. Still, she was able to interpret the seemingly random scribbles. Riza frowned. A flower shop? Then she realized that the piece of paper was a ticket to get the flowers—along with a few dollars.

Of course. For his date tonight with Spitfire. Riza forced down some choice words and nasty thoughts. She considered not going; it wasn't a military matter anyway. Why should she bother walking all that way for his personal life? Especially since it involved _Spitfire. _

"I need the exercise," Riza concluded to herself. That would be her reason for walking the several blocks to the flower shop. Exercise. It didn't matter that she had ran three miles instead of two that morning. She needed more exercise.

Riza's walk to the aforementioned flower shop was unremarkable. She spent most of it deep in thought, thinking, though she tried not to, about her feelings. It was not like her to be jealous. She usually went through her life without caring greatly about anyone else. Nothing was intensely important to her other than the few things she designated to be. She forsook all distractions so that she could devote all of herself to the things that were important to her.

Her conclusion was this: There were only three things in her life that _really _mattered to her—Mustang, herself, and Black Hayate. Anything else was insignificant. These were the three things that she got up for, fought for, worked for, would die for. She was not surprised that, when ordered in importance, the list stayed the same. Colonel Roy Mustang was the first. Riza asked herself why. Since she was interrogating herself like this, she might as well go all the way. Why was she so devoted to him? Riza could not think any words to answer the question.

And suddenly she was at the flower shop. Flower Fields it was called. What a stupid name. Riza casually entered, ignoring all of the stares she got for her uniform. She'd thought that they would be used to the uniform, considering their proximity to the military. The woman behind the counter was an elderly woman who smiled when she read the ticket that Riza gave to her.

"Aah, yes. A man ordered these over the phone this morning. He had a very handsome voice, I recall," The woman said, her wrinkled face becoming even more so from the broad grin across her face. "These wouldn't be for you dear, would they?"

"No, actually, they're not ma'am," Riza admitted bluntly. The woman's face sank a little bit. Apparently she had imagined some sort of cute romance between them.

"Oh. All right then. I'll go get them," The woman disappeared for a moment. When she returned, she was holding a large—it was almost ridiculously so—bouquet of day lilies. Riza took hold of them and sighed. Day lilies were Mustang's trademark flower; they symbolized flirtatiousness. Riza had always thought that was very fitting. A voice in the back of her mind also wondered how many other people understood what the flowers meant and that they were his favorites, unlike the roses he received in abundance.

Riza gave the woman the money Mustang had given her and left. On her way back, she was the object of a great many stares. She was sure she looked fairly odd with the bouquet.

Once more her mind pestered her, demanding to know why she bothered doing this for him.

"Exercise," Riza said firmly. "Exercise."

OOOOOOOOO

It had been a long day for her. A very long day. In fact, it seemed like it had been two or three days since she had dropped the day lilies off to a grinning Mustang, who thanked her with just a distracted "thanks."

Riza was almost giddy with relief when the clock finally read 7:30. Finally she could go home and get some sleep to vanquish the headache that was currently throbbing slightly above her left eye. Finally she could go home and enjoy Black Hayate's company. Finally she could go home and _forget _about Spitfire for a few hours.

She had not been startled in the least when Mustang had dropped off a load of work on her desk on his way out—at six to get ready for his big date. But it was very obnoxious of him to do that. Usually he only left an hour before his date. Not two. What on earth could he need two hours for? An image of him fussing in front of the mirror did not improve her mood.

Gratefully she pushed aside her work. She would get to that in the morning. Riza locked her office and was convinced that she was home free. Then she passed Mustang's dark office. Out of habit, she glanced in the window. She stopped. That was his bouquet sitting on his desk. Surely he hadn't forgotten it? Riza stood there for a moment in indecision. There was not a chance that he would have forgotten those flowers.

But they were still sitting there abandoned. Maybe, she thought hopefully, he decided Spitfire didn't deserve them. Of course that wasn't the case, and Riza felt a little guilty. Was she really that desperate to keep Mustang and Spitfire apart? Riza was increasingly aware that she was being like a selfish spoiled brat, and hated herself for it. But she hated herself even more, for more than just the jealousy. She wouldn't be jealous if, somewhere, in the depths of her mind, she wasn't a little bit in love with him.

Riza bit her lip. That, in all of her of her memory, was the first time she had actually _thought _that, in those clear words. She was...in love with him.

"But only a little!" She protested under her breath.

The day lilies were still in there. Riza stood undecided for a second longer, then took out the key to his office—Mustang had given it to her long ago, in case she had to do some of his last minute work. She stepped into his office, and neglected to turn on the light. The whole building did not need to be alerted of her presence in an office other than her own.

Riza glared at the day lilies and procrastinated for one second longer. She wondered if he would do this for her. He didn't deserve this after the way he had been ignoring her lately. And it wasn't like his date would be ruined without the day lilies. Mustang was the real attraction there. No, she decided, reflecting back on her previous question, he probably wouldn't do something like this for her. But enough thought. A decision needed to be made.

Riza reached down and grabbed the flowers roughly. She was too loyal.

OOOOOOO

"Shit," Roy muttered for the hundredth time that night. He had left early, gotten cleaned up and prepared for this date...and he forgot the flowers! Roy tapped his foot on the sidewalk outside the fancy restaurant. Spitfire was late. He took a moment to consider why she would be late. Maybe she couldn't decide which dress to wear—the short one or the shorter one. Roy hoped she chose the shorter one. She was sure to have great legs.

Of course that was just what he wanted to think—she could have been sidetracked by another man or something...Roy smiled at himself. It seemed that he was either disgustingly optimistic or heinously pessimistic tonight. He was in a good mood. It was nice to be worried about something as trivial as a date, instead of life-or-death matters. But suddenly this was a life-or-death matter .Where was she? And how could he have been stupid enough to forget the flowers!

He had been hoping to impress her with those day lilies. If he had not forgotten them. Damn. And he had spent good money on them too. Roy pulled his silver alchemist pocket watch out of his fancy trousers' pocket. It was 8:15. She was pushing the "fashionably late" aspect. He slipped the watch back in his pocket. There was no need to attract attention. As far as he knew, he was one of the only people in the military who actually used his alchemist watch as a _watch._ Most just considered them a part of their uniform and just as useful. Oh well. To him it was just an item to use. Nothing entirely special. Unlike those day lilies.

"Shit," Roy muttered again. It wasn't like him to forget something like that. But he didn't dare go back to get them from his office. He'd miss the fashionably late Spitfire.

"Sir!"

Roy felt relief flood through him. She had _finally _come! He whirled to face the voice, and then realized that it wasn't Spitfire's voice...

"Hawkeye! What are you doing here!" He asked angrily. The absolute last thing he needed was for Spitfire to see him with her.

Riza flinched from his tone, but thrust the flowers in front of her, "You forgot these, sir."

Roy snatched the flowers from her quickly, relief momentarily crossing his face. He took a quick look around.

"Damn, there she is! Go away!" He commanded harshly, waving her off. Riza felt the anger rise in her. She had gone out of her way for this? No gratitude, just an order to get lost? She spun on her heel in a quick about-face and walked stiffly, but quickly away. Just as she turned the corner, she heard Spitfire's squeal of delight.

"Oh Roy! These are so beautiful!"

"Not as beautiful as you. That nice, long dress suits you perfectly, Rain."

Riza clenched her fists. They were on a first-name basis now? Absolutely wonderful. She walked even faster, trying to tire the anger out of her.

OOOOOOO

Black Hayate greeted her eagerly when she reached her apartment, but Riza simply told him to shut up. The very well-disciplined dog obeyed, but only left her completely alone after he had been fed. Riza fell onto her bed and welcomed the darkness. Her headache had tripled its attack on her. She tried to fall asleep without thinking, but it was futile. All she could think of was Spitfire, and her delightful "Oh Roy! These are so beautiful!" Mustang wouldn't have had those flowers if it hadn't been for her.

She shouldn't have bothered taking them to him. Riza turned over restlessly in her bed. Sleep refused to come to her.

It was a long night, to accompany a long day.

OOOOOO

A/N: Nope. No one's gotten her namesake yet. But that's okay. I'll reveal it to you at the end. This fic should have _at least _another five thousand words. (Now watch it be shorter, just to spite me.)

Oh yea. Poor Roy. Spitfire wore a long dress. Ha ha. I'm so evil. Please review, and there will be more evilness.

* * *


	5. Chapter 4: Diary

Disclaimer: Still don't own it, just in case you've forgotten my other disclaimers.

A/N: Another chapter! And this one is longer than all of the previous ones. See, I told you that they would start getting longer.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Riza woke up with her heart pounding. She sat up quickly, breathing hard. It was only a dream, only a dream. A very realistic dream. Riza put her fingers to her lips, trying to wipe the lingering dream-sensation away. She had never had a dream like this before. Reliving the dream, she could feel her cheeks grow warm and her heart beat speeding up.

In her dream she had been in the middle of a field, with no sign of civilization anywhere. Just before the loneliness of the vast plain could overwhelm her, she had been forcefully spun around by Mustang, who had come up from behind her. Then he kissed her. And kissed her. And if she hadn't woken up, maybe...

She could still feel his lips on hers, regardless of the fact it had been a dream. Riza once again tried to rid herself of the sensation, extremely pleasant though it had been. How could she have imagined something like that! He was her _superior_ for God's sake, and to even dream of him like that was rigidly against her ideals.

Riza was consumed by a horrible wave of jealously. Spitfire could dream of him like that, though why she would have to go through the trouble of dreaming about it, rather than living through it was incomprehensible. Riza wondered if Spitfire had been kissed by him yet. She wouldn't doubt it.

The sharp ringing of her clock in the other room sounded through the night. Riza counted the chimes. One. Two. Three. She waited for the fourth. It didn't come. She groaned. It was only three in the morning, and after that dream, her chances of falling asleep again were very slim. She was too afraid that she would repeat the dream. And she couldn't afford to do that. It was too tempting.

She slid out of her warm bed and turned on the light. Black Hayate, curled up in the corner of the room, woke for a minute to see what was wrong. He watched Riza grab a small book, then decided that there was nothing of interest going on, so returned to his dream of chasing a fat rabbit.

Riza laid back in bed, with her diary and pen in hand. Writing in a diary was a habit reminiscent of her experience in the Ishbal war. She often credited her diary for being one of two things that had kept her sane during that horrible war. Whenever she had felt that it was impossible for her to kill another person, and all the more possible to kill herself, she would write all of the damning things she had done in the diary. Somehow it had helped.

Now, whenever she needed to sort something out, she would write it down. It clarified things to her. And tonight she needed to clarify some things. Riza wrote for nearly two hours, and when the clock chimed five times, she put down her pen and flexed her hand, which was cramped from all of the writing.

She got up and dressed. Usually this was when she would go running for two miles, to keep herself in shape. However, this morning she had to go in early and to the work she had neglected the night before. And if she went in this early, she wouldn't have to deal with Mustang for a few hours. After the flower incident, and then the dream, she was a mess of contradictory thoughts and desires.

Riza spent a moment in consideration, then grabbed her diary on the way out. Should she get some free time, she wanted to write a little bit more—while she was dressing she had come to a conclusion.

The paperwork was waiting patiently for her, and Riza immersed herself in it gratefully. It banished her dream to a vague corner of her mind that only bothered her when she stopped reading for a moment.

Seven came too soon for Riza. She did not want to go give her morning report to Mustang and turn in the paper work she had completed. She half expected him to tell her to get lost again. Stupid day lilies.

Riza grabbed the pile of papers, not even noticing that her diary was in the stack. She walked down to his office. Maybe, she thought, he'll say something about the flower incident last night, or at least acknowledge the fact that I came in two hours early, in part to finish some of the things he couldn't do because he left two hours early last night. She was too loyal, almost infinitely it seemed. Was there a limit to it?

A ghost of a smile played across her lips. He wouldn't say a word to her, and she knew it. Yet she was still stupid enough to imagine it. She reached his office, but did not go in. His door was almost shut, left open only a crack. Riza stopped to listen, to see if there was someone in there that she shouldn't interrupt.

"Ah, I have so much paperwork to do," She heard Mustang complain. "Sorry Rain. I can't go tonight." Riza frowned. Naturally Spitifre was in there.

"Hmph," Spitfire said, "You shouldn't have so much paperwork to do. That Lieutenant Hawkeye of yours should do more work. Look at her, leaving you to do all this because she's lazy."

Riza froze. She, lazy? That was it. Somewhere inside of her, Riza felt her tolerance snap. She would do everything without any recognition or gratitude, but she would not be called lazy! Did that Spitfire know how lazy Mustang was? Apparently, there was a limit to her loyalty. Well, if he wanted to sit in his office all day gossiping with his beloved Spitfire, so be it. She wouldn't interrupt them. Riza knocked harshly on the door, deposited the paperwork at the base of the door, and left.

She was going to take the day off. Let Spitfire see how much work Mustang did without her. Riza heard a little voice in her mind telling her that she was overreacting, but she brushed it aside. She needed a day without that man. Every day she saw him, and now she was dreaming about him too. This was something she desperately needed.

OOOOOOOOOO

Roy got up from his desk at the knock. He opened the door and saw the pile of papers.

"What is that?" Rain asked him. "What are all those papers?"

"Huh," Roy muttered, "guess Hawkeye left me these." He looked and saw that they had all been signed—they were completed. He lifted the stack and sat them on his desk.

Rain twirled her auburn hair around her finger. "Look at that. She's too lazy to even come in and salute you."

"At least she did these," Roy said, slightly annoyed at Rain's attitude. "She's not as lazy as you think." Rain shrugged.

"Oh well," Rain remarked. "I've got to go back to my office now. Sorry you can't come tonight. We'd have so much fun."

"Don't worry, Colonel Spitfire," Roy assured her. "We'll have fun tomorrow night. Don't forget to tell your friend how much I loved that restaurant last night. She works at a great place."

"I'll tell her," Rain answered over her shoulder as she left.

Roy watched her go, and then turned his attention to the papers in front of him. He half-heartedly flipped through them to make sure that all of them were complete. There really was no reason for him to check. Hawkeye always did her work.

Wait...what was that? Roy pulled out the dully bound leather book from under the pile. The cover was totally blank, except for a simple leaf pattern around the edges. He opened it, and was surprised to see that the pages were covered with cramped writing. It was a diary! Roy momentarily wondered if he should go ask Hawkeye if it was hers, but then he didn't know for sure that she had left those papers in front of his door. And if he asked Hawkeye, and it wasn't hers...that would just be awkward.

"I'll just read one entry," Roy muttered. "Then I'll be able to tell whose it is." He glanced at the writing. To his surprise, the handwriting looked almost exactly like his. Roy frowned. That was rather scary. He settled into his chair and began to read.

An hour later, he was utterly engrossed. Every time he thought he had a decent guess on the identity of the person, there would be an entry to contradict him. He knew one thing for sure—the writer was a female. And while that narrowed it down, there were still too many possibilities. Hawkeye was still a candidate, but if it was her, there was so much he had never known about her. And since he was sure that he knew her fairly well, she was not at the top of his list.

The person was a trained person of the military, for every person mentioned was not written with a name, but some sort of number or letter. That had taken some getting used to, and he had a vague idea of the identity of some of the people referenced. Roy's conscience was starting to pester him, but he pushed it aside. He had already read this far, so he might as well go until he figured out for certain who the author was. And when he did figure it out, he would know this person so much better—but the handwriting still unnerved him. It was almost a perfect replica of his writing, if only being slightly neater. What a strange coincidence that two people could have such similar handwriting.

Roy suddenly realized that he had spent a great deal of time reading, and he still had a great deal of work to do. He sighed in dismay and read one final entry before going to work.

_Today is my birthday. As usual, I spent it alone. However, I find it is far lonelier tonight for some reason. I have not celebrated my birthday for a few years now, so why is it bothering me this time? This is just another day of the year, and as special as any other. A birthday is such a pointless celebration, because your life starts when you are conceived, not when you enter this world. _

_Still, this day makes me look back on my life, and look forward as well. What did I want to be at this age? What do I want to be at my next birthday? I remember telling my friends when I was just a child that I wanted to be a bride. How foolish, and how far from my current state. But I don't need anyone. Loneliness can be conquered, and I have done so. Besides, I have my hands full with another anyway. He doesn't notice me, or care about me, but I, strangely enough, notice and care about him. _

_I have no explanation for this. P-51 has done nothing for me at all. And yet I'd follow him to the end of the earth. Officially, I am a hypocrite. I do not like having to do with anything that is not a firmly logical course of action. My devotion to P-51 is not logical. _

_This also brings me to how he has changed me. When I was a child, all I concerned myself with was myself, and being the best. Nothing stood in my way, and if I had a superior, I worked until I was the superior. This was because I would be consumed with jealousy when I met someone better than I. _

_And yet, all this changed when I entered the military. I met someone so better, so impossibly beyond me, that all of my jealousy was forgotten. I finally realized how small I was, and how insignificant. It is truly amazing to meet someone who is infinitely above you, that all you can do is dedicate yourself to them._

_But enough of that. It is just another day in the year; another day in my life. It is no more special or important than any other. P-51 is still the ultimate in my universe, though he gives me no notice at all. I am a hypocrite. And I might be a lonely hypocrite. But that is not important to anyone. I will conquer my loneliness, as I have every day. And even though P-51 uses me, I will stay with him. There is nothing left to discuss. _

Roy reluctantly shut the diary and shoved it in his desk. That last entry left him with a bitter taste in his mouth. It was so depressing. P-51 was written about more often than any other entity, and Roy wondered who in the world could be so wonderful that this person would give their entire life to them. The sooner he figured out whose diary it was, the sooner he could figure out who this arrogant bastard P-51 was.

P-51 annoyed him. How could this person not notice the author of the diary? P-51 had to be the most self-centered blind person in the world.

He grabbed a pen and started on his work. The sooner he got it done, the sooner he could continue reading, and then he could figure the whole thing out.

OOOOOOOOOOOOO

"There is nothing left to discuss, Hayate," Riza fumed to the canine, who lay in her lap contentedly. "I was a bitch today. I don't know why I'm acting like this. If Mustang is happy with Spitfire, I should be overjoyed, even though in the end, I suppose he'll end up getting tired of her and find some new toy. I don't know why she bothers me so badly. I'm sure Mustang treats all of his girlfriends like that, I guess I've just never witnessed it so closely before. Well, if she thinks that I'm lazy, that is her opinion."

Hayate said nothing. Riza smiled wearily. That was what was so nice about him. She could say anything she wanted to him and he would never berate her or argue with her or laugh at her.

"I hate the fact that I think I'm in..." Riza paused. She just couldn't say it. "Never mind, boy. It's not something I need to voice. After a while, it will go away, I'm certain. And if I truly do...like...him, I shouldn't stand in his way. After all, haven't I been helping him all of this time? What kind of fool would I be to stand in the way of his happiness..." She trailed off, uncomfortably aware that her throat was tightening. It was getting harder to speak. Riza shook her head and got up. Hayate reluctantly left her warm lap and found a comfortable patch of floor.

Riza lay down on her bed and tried to forget the fact that she had been very close to crying. And for what? There was nothing to be crying about. But then, there was nothing to be happy about, either.

OOOOOOOOOO

A/N: Oh yeah. Sorry my reviewers. I haven't been responding to you. So here are some responses.

Aphrael-chibi: I do think that Mustang deserves the Jerk-of-the-Year award, even though he is one of my favorite characters. And I don't spoil you, you spoil me with your reviews.

az4ever: Okay, I know that Mustang wouldn't _intentionally _treat her like this, but you see, he doesn't realize what he's doing yet. But he will, he will.


	6. Chapter 5: P51

Disclaimer: Nothing's changed.I still don't own it.

A/N: Wow. I'm updating this so fast, it's not even funny. But then, if I didn't get so many reviews, I wouldn't be writing so fast. So thank you! As of now, I have 17 reviews. That's a record people. "Me Neither" had the most reviews--13--but now it has been dethroned! THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH!

I love all of my reviewers, even the ones who say they don't like my stories. I have no problem with that. In anycase, it makes me appreciate the good reviews even more. Anyway, my goal for this story is 12,000 words and 20 reviews. So far, I'm right on track! And this chapter is short (unlike this author's note) but the next one will be long.

Also, it is the last real chapter. After that is the epilogue. It's gone really fast, hasn't it?(At least I think so.) Anyway, please continue to enjoy.

OOOOOOOOOOO

"Hayate, I've got to go back eventually," Riza said to the dog, who ignored her and continued crunching on his dog food. "But I don't..." She struggled to find her train of thought. Why was she talking to Black Hayate so much lately? Riza sighed. She had been eager to write an important entry in her diary—she had come to a conclusion about her feelings, but whenever she thought about actually _writing _it, Riza felt herself seize up. She didn't want to write her conclusion, but she didn't want to go into the office today, either.

It had only been yesterday since she had stormed out, enraged after overhearing Spitifre calling her lazy. Riza had abruptly taken the day off, without bothering to notify Mustang. Not surprisingly, it did not appear that he noticed her absence, and if he did, he didn't care, otherwise she had assumed that he would call. But he hadn't, and that only proved her point.

Riza knew she needed to go back to work, but she hadn't sorted her feelings out as well as she had wanted to. Was it even possible to resolve such puzzling feelings?

Her clock chimed ten times. It was already late in the afternoon.

"I suppose that I need to go," Riza remarked to Hayate. She grabbed her coat and walked meaningfully towards the door; she even got as far as putting her hand on the brass knob before pausing. She just couldn't face him. Not today. Not when her hatred for him was only matched by her desire for him. Neither were the emotions that were _supposed _to be directed to her superior.

"I can't do it Hayate," She mumbled. "I know that I have to confront my feelings for him...but I can't. I'm...too...scared...of what I'll find myself confronting."

Black Hayate turned his warm eyes away from his food for a moment to gaze in confusion at his master. Her tone of voice was not familiar to him, and it was making him nervous. He whimpered. Riza smiled half-heartedly and bent down to scratch him behind the ears.

"Thanks for caring Hayate."

His tail started wagging.

She sighed and returned her coat to its hanger. She wasn't going to go. But she was going to write in her diary, and write about what she sorely wished would just leave her alone. Emotions had never been so tedious towards her.

Riza walked into her bedroom to retrieve her diary, and was mildly surprised that it wasn't there. That was odd. She usually never took it out of that room. Where else would she have left it? Riza spent a few minutes hunting around her room. When was the last time she had seen it? She had been writing in it yesterday at three in the morning, then she had gone to the office. So where...?

"Hayate, do you know where—? " Riza asked, even as she realized the answer. Her stomach twisted in a most unpleasant fashion. She had taken it with her to her office, intending to write in it there if she had gotten a chance. She had put it on a pile of papers, and she had given those papers to...

Riza bolted out the door, not even bothering to grab her coat. Hayate's ears perked up, and he watched the door for a while, expecting her to pop back in. When she didn't, Black Hayate settled down on her bed; he wasn't allowed on the bed when she was present, but when she was gone, he always took the time to enjoy it.

"How could I have been so stupid!" Riza asked herself as she dashed towards the military headquarters. The one time she had taken her diary anywhere other than her room, she left it in the stupidest place imaginable. Riza tried to calm herself down. She probably hadn't taken it with the pile of papers to Mustang's office; she had most likely shoved it in her impeccably clean desk, and just didn't remember doing it. After all, she hadn't remembered carrying it to her office for a while.

When she reached the military headquarters, she forced herself to stop running, and be satisfied with a quick walk. It still seemed to take an eternity to get to her office. And when she got there, Riza searched every single place she would have ever stored something in.

She did not find it.

Finally, Riza concluded there was one last thing for her to do.

She had to go see a Colonel Roy Mustang.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Roy pulled out the diary from his desk drawer and flipped it open to last page he had read. Apparently, the author was having a particularly tremulous time with the all-mighty P-51, because he was cheating on her. At least that was how he understood it. The entry was a very long one, but he was on its final paragraphs.

_And yet after writing all of this, I still am no closer to resolving my feelings for P-51. He is arrogant, selfish, prideful, lazy; motivated, loyal, strong, handsome—all of these traits describe him. The first four I loathe. The latter four I adore. It used to be so simple being around him. All I had to do was listen to his orders and follow them. I made sure that he didn't do something hideously stupid _or_ get himself killed. But now...Every time I see him, I can't decide whether or not I want to hit him or kiss him. And neither of these is an appropriate course of action. _

_Why? Why after all of this time, has this happened _now_? Maybe it is because of Mk.XIV. She came along, and forced me into some interesting situations. Maybe I have always felt like this. Maybe I just failed to recognize it because it was already so much a part of me. _

_I don't know. _

_But it doesn't matter. _

_He doesn't care, doesn't notice, doesn't understand. He probably never will. And yet I shall follow him. I shall help him, be there for him. There is something about him that makes me stay, even though there is no logical reason to. _

_And thus this brings me to my final conclusion. These are the words that I will never express on my lips, nor to him in anyway or form. But here, I have to write it. _

_My true feelings for P-51. _

_I think, to the furthest extent of my knowledge, that this emotion can fully be qualified as such. _

_P-51. I _

Roy blinked. That was all it said. The sentence was left unfinished. He frantically flipped through the remaining pages, and was disappointed. There was no more. That was it. And he _still _hadn't figured out whose diary it was.

"Sir, have you seen a small—" Riza asked anxiously, bursting through the door. Roy was so startled that he didn't even have time to shove the diary in his desk. Her eyes fell on it and she finished her sentence as a gasp. "—book."

Neither said anything for a moment, their eyes just frozen, locked with each other's. Riza felt her entire body stiffen and fill with a thousand different emotions, each as powerful as the other. Roy saw the utterly stunned look on her face, and painfully realized that the diary he had just finished reading was...

And then the eternal moment ended, and as if to make up for its length, everything else happened at twice the normal speed. Roy watched her face contort in horror and Riza spun around and ran out of the room. He jumped up from his seat, pausing only to grab the diary, and ran after her.

"Hawkeye! Wait!" He called to her, startled to see just how far down the hallway she was already.

Riza ran all the way to the sanctuary of her office, ignoring his calls. She didn't want to—couldn't, absolutely couldn't—face him now. Her throat was once again tight, and her eyes warned her that she was on the verge of crying.

She flung open her office door, and shut it behind her. To her dismay, Spitfire was standing at her desk. Spitfire eyed her for a moment.

"Hawkeye. You left early yesterday. Are you all right--?" Spitfire began.

"Get out!" Riza yelled. "Just...get out..." She couldn't speak anymore. It took all of her willpower not to start bawling that instant. Spitfire gave her a worried look, and left.

Riza sank into her chair, and stared at the ceiling until she got control of herself. It took her a long time.

OOOOOOOOOOOO

Several hours, her eyes flew open. Riza glanced around her office, trying to orient herself. Momentarily she realized that she had fallen asleep. Soon after, she remembered why she was in her office behind a locked door.

"Shit..." Riza murmured. She was surprisingly emotionless. The rational part of her mind noted that she was in a state of shock.

There was a knock on the door—Riza assumed that was why she had woken in the first place.

"What do you want?" She asked bitterly.

"Hawkeye...I need to talk to you. Please." It was Mustang. Riza got up duly and opened the door. She didn't care anymore. He entered, his face a strange mix of emotions. Riza waited.

"Hawkeye, I want to talk about this P-51."

OOOOOOOOOOO


	7. Chapter 6: Orders and Desires

Disclaimer: I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist.

A/N: All right. The moment you've all been waiting for. This is the last chapter, and now I shall reveal the reasoning behind Spitfire's name. **Flava Sava **was the first person to guess correctly--Spitfire is the name of a fighter plane. Congratulations Flava Sava! See, all of the people in the military are named after aircraft. Roy Mustang gets his name from the P-51 North American Mustang, which is widely considered to be the U.S.'s most powerful fighter. Rain Spitfire gets her name from the British Supermarine Spitfire, Britain's top fighter plane. Her first name was Rain, because it began with an 'R' to match Roy and Riza, and because Roy hates rain, so that added some irony. Anyway, now that that's done, enjoy the last chapter.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Riza felt her heart sink. He wanted to talk about P-51. Absolutely wonderful. Her thoughts suddenly brought to mind all of the horrible things she had written about P-51, in her brief spats with anger and jealousy. They were not things to be read by someone else.

"Sir, I..." Riza wasn't sure how to approach the situation. It was a very awkward situation, and she didn't feel like dealing with it, but she knew she didn't have a choice. Her mission: To end the conversation as quickly and neatly as possible, and avoid talking about her...feelings. After reading the diary, he should know anyway. She glanced at Roy. He was fiddling with his collar—apparently he was having the same trouble that she was.

"Hawkeye," Roy finally said, closing the door quietly behind him, "if I had known that the diary was yours, I never would have read it."

"Well," Riza remarked, "now you know."

"Yes, now I know..." Roy echoed, still searching for the right thing to say. "I know about P-51."

Riza winced. "Sir, all those things I wrote—"

"—were absolutely true," Roy interrupted. "When I started reading the diary, the first thing I noticed was that P-51 was a self-centered, arrogant bastard. I hated him from the start. And why the author of the diary stuck with him, I could never understand. That's why I didn't think it was yours. You're _Riza Hawkeye_. You're always so distant and cool, calm and collected and _practical_. It was inconceivable to me that you would devote yourself to a selfish man."

"Colonel, I--!" Riza wanted to yell at him, to deny it, to say she didn't mean those things, but she couldn't figure out how to express it all.

"Why do you stick with that bastard, Hawkeye? What has he ever done to deserve you!" Roy's voice was harsh and demanding.

Riza couldn't answer. There was nothing she could say. The floor that she was staring at started to blur. Riza bit her lip in disgust. Her eyes were going to betray her again!

"Why? Why do you stay with him?" Roy tried to meet her eyes, but Riza kept her watery gaze on the floor. She didn't want to see those dark eyes that she knew so well. Those dark eyes that threatened to capture her, as they had once in her dream.

"...He doesn't...deserve to have you," Roy's voice was softer now.

Riza tried to talk, tried to say that it was true, he didn't deserve someone as weak as she. She drew a shuddering breath to try to keep in the tears that were adamant to fall. When was the last time she had felt this vulnerable; when was the last time she had cried like this?

"_You what!" Riza asked angrily. She had heard that her new superior Mustang had done something stupid; something as stupid as attempting suicide. Apparently the war was getting to him; but then, it was starting to crack all of the sane people in the military. Having to kill every Ishballan they came across—total war—could not be aptly justified to those who had a sliver of conscience, a hint of humanity. _

_He didn't look at her, and didn't answer her question. Riza clenched her fists. She wasn't going to let him do something as idiotic as kill himself. _

"_Sir! Look at me!" When she was ignored, Riza walked up to him and turned him around forcefully. _

"_Go away Hawkeye." _

"_How can I leave you alone if I might come back and find you dead? Don't you think that there are enough people trying to kill you without your help!" She realized that she was yelling rather loudly, and that she was crying. She was crying with anger—how could a man like him even think of doing that?_

"_I said go away." _

"_Fine! But if a man like you wants to kill himself, then I _need _to kill myself," Riza spat. _

"_You can't kill yourself," Mustang muttered. _

"_I know how to pull this trigger," Riza threatened, pulling out one of her pistols. _That _made Roy spin around. With one swift motion, he deftly knocked the gun out of her hand. _

"_Don't," Roy said heatedly. "Don't even JOKE about that."_

_Riza smiled wearily; there were tears of relief in her eyes now, "Then, you can't joke about it either, sir." _

_He tried to hide his true emotions with a half-hearted smirk. "All right then." _

Riza had known it. He was the source of her tears, as he was now. Strange—the man who gave her the most happiness also gave her the most pain.

She looked up to face him with this new revelation, and wished she hadn't. His face was awash with worry, anger, and...almost...Riza refused herself the privilege of finishing the thought.

"Riza, why don't you leave P-51? I'm sure there are plenty of people out there who would realize what they had..."

Riza felt her throat constrict. That was it. He had just told her that she should go because he didn't feel that way about her. And yet, she heard herself respond, "I can't."

"I can't," She said again, firmer this time, because she had finally given up on fighting the tears. There was something more important to accomplish.

"I can't leave him, sir. I love him."

She waited. Those were the words, the admission that she had been denying for longer than she consciously knew. She waited for lightning to strike her. She waited for the world to end. She waited for Roy to yell at her, to laugh at her, to mock her. This was it. She had given herself entirely on a shadow; a dream. And now it was time to wake up.

"Equivalent Exchange. That's what every alchemist learns," Roy murmured, his gaze fixated on the ground, as hers had been moments before. "To obtain, something of equal value must be lost. And yet, he—I—haven't given anything. I've been an arrogant, self-centered bastard. I've never done one thing in my life to earn something as precious as you."

"Sir! That's not—!" Riza cried.

"See? Look, you're crying. The only thing I've ever done was hurt you," He turned away. "There's nothing I could ever do to measure up to what you've already given me, but I've been a fool, an idiot, to not realize it until now. I'm sorry."

"Sir!" Riza gasped, and then started sobbing. She couldn't stand _this_! Riza had never thought that he would return her feelings, or at least not throw them back in her face. This was not what she had been expecting. How could he think of himself like that? Riza hated herself now, because she was the one who had made him think like that. If she had never written those things in her diary, they wouldn't be here in this situation. This was all her fault.

"I'm...sorry..." Roy whispered. He kept his back to her, and tried not to think of the tears that had sparkled on her cheeks. He wanted her to understand that she deserved someone who really cared about her. He once though _he _cared about her, but her diary made him realize that he knew nothing about her, and that she was too good for him.

It didn't matter that he couldn't see her. Roy could still hear the sobs that she tried to stifle. That sound was too much for him to bear. He turned around and glanced at her. His first instinct was to comfort her, the way he would comfort any other woman—to take her in his arms and kiss her until she forgot why she had been crying in the first place. But he was the reason she was crying. What could he do? How could he apologize for all of the times he had ignored her or forgotten her? How could he apologize for never seeing how she felt? There were simply no words powerful enough.

"Hawkeye..." He was at a complete loss.

Riza, by some incredible feat, managed to say, "Sir...I meant what I said. Everything in that diary...was true. I won't lie to you. All that I wrote was what I truly think about you, but I should never have expressed it. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said all those bad things about you, and I shouldn't have said that I loved you. That crossed the line. I must apologize, but I cannot take anything back. Please, excuse me. And have a good evening...colonel." She walked towards the door that he partially blocked, grabbed the handle, and waited for him to let her out.

"Riza..." He couldn't let her leave; not without her knowing all that he felt. There was still something hanging between them, something she had not asked, but the question remained. Unspoken but understood. She loved him. But did he love her? Such a blunt question, but so difficult to answer. Until a few moments ago, he never would have put love and Hawkeye in the same sentence, except for a joke about miniskirts. Roy had no doubt that she felt strongly for him, though whether it really was love, he wasn't sure. At least, that's what he wanted to think.

Riza would never have said something like that lightly. She truly loved him. That fact thrilled him as much as it unnerved him. Many women had told him those very words over his lifetime, but none of their words had meant anything to him. He had been attracted to the women, yes, but he had never really cared for them. Not the way he cared for Hawkeye.

To him, she had always been something beyond his reach, and to be treasured because of it. Roy had never expected to actually mean something to her. To find out that he did, in fact, _mean _something to her, was far beyond what he currently believed he deserved.

"Why didn't you ever tell me what a bastard I was...?" He asked. Riza did not respond. She was preoccupied with another battle—their current position had placed them far too close physically. From this range it would be so easy for her to just reach out...then she could try other methods of telling him that she didn't really think that of him at all. Images of her entirely forbidden dream came to her readily. Riza felt her pulse speeding up as she fought down inappropriate desires.

To her utmost horror, he stepped in even closer to her and held her shoulders lightly.

"I wish," he whispered. "That there was something I could say that would fix everything."

"Sir, please..." Riza pleaded almost inaudibly. As if it hadn't been hard for her when they _weren't _sustaining any contact, he had to go and do this to her. At this point, Riza didn't care anymore. She had told him that she loved him, and as far as she knew, would always love him. She had tried to tell him that he wasn't the monster he thought he was, that she was undeserving of him, not vise-versa. She had said everything, and he had read everything. Wasn't that enough? And yet here he was, unknowingly torturing her with his mere presence. Not that his presence was anything close to mere.

"I wish," Roy continued, oblivious to her plight. "That I could simply say that I return your feelings. But...I don't want to lie to you. And yet, I'm not sure at the moment that it would be lying. You've given me your heart—what on this earth could I ever give in return for that?"

Riza sighed inwardly at this seemingly stupid statement. There was something equivalent to her heart—all he had to do was to give her his.

"Your heart," Riza replied, before even realizing that she had said it out loud. She bit her tongue—albeit too late—and glanced hesitantly up to see his reaction.

"If," He took one final step closer to her. Now they were just an insignificant inch apart. "If that would be enough..."

For a heart-skipping moment, Riza thought that he was going to kiss her. And how badly she wanted that! She met his eyes, and wondered if he was going through the same internal conflict. Then, he gave her one last look of...almost—Riza again refused to complete the thought—and walked out the very door she had been so eager to pass through.

The door, though it closed quietly, seemed to echo in the newly silent room. Riza stared at the spot where he had been for a long time before returning wearily to the chair she had been sleeping on earlier in the day. By now it had to be late. She looked at the clock and confirmed her suspicions—it was nine.

"He stayed late tonight," Riza muttered absently. Her voice sounded foreign to her. It was calm and collected. Nothing could be farther from her current state. Her heart was still pounding away in her ears, a constant reminder of how _close _they had just been.

Riza tried to remember half of what had passed between them—spoken or not. She didn't think the issue between them was entirely resolved. It might never be resolved. Still, they had admitted to things that were forbidden. Riza's practical mind finally returned, and lurched her to reality. Even if she loved him, and he loved her, they could never be together. Would it hurt as badly if she had never accepted that she loved him? Because now that she knew, would that make it even worse?

"WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME!" The door flew open and revealed Rain Spitfire. Riza, after she nearly jumped out of her chair in surprise, wished she had remembered to lock the door.

"If I had known, I would have backed off!" Rain declared loudly. Riza wondered what she was talking about, and if everyone in Amestris could hear her.

"What are you—" Riza tried to ask, not even bothering to salute. Rain rolled her eyes at Riza.

"Now see here, first lieutenant, when I came here, if you had just told me you and Roy was together, I would have left you alone!"

"But we're—"Riza felt her heart sink. If Rain knew, then surely she would report it to someone higher up, and then there would be trouble.

"Uh-huh. You deny it. Well, I'm not stupid. If you weren't together before I came, it was just going to be a matter of time. If you had _told _me to get the hell out, I would have," Rain said.

Riza was indeed about to deny it, when she realized that Rain was mad at her _because _she wasn't with Roy.

"I mean really," Rain continued, her tirade still coming, "did you think that I wouldn't notice? On my date with Mr. Mustang, all he talked about was 'Lieutenant Hawkeye' this or 'Lieutenant Hawkeye' that. For goodness sakes' I would have mistaken him for your husband had I not known otherwise. You should have heard him yell at me when I called you a lazy lieutenant."

"And then there was you. For a while, I thought you were the next thing to an android. You did everything for him, and did everything properly, to the letter. His infatuation with you was obvious, but I didn't realize you felt the same way for a while. But now I know better. Heck, you probably know his favorite flower!"

"Day lilies..." Riza muttered. "But he and I, we don't—"

Rain raised an eyebrow. Her dark blue eyes dared her to tell the lie.

"—we can't," Riza corrected herself. Rain's eyebrow went up further. "Sure you can't. But you have anyway, haven't you? You love him just the same."

Riza sighed. Was there ever going to be a moment of peace for her after this? For a moment she had actually been entertaining the notion of hoping that she had Roy could forget what had happened and coexist as they always had. But now it seemed as if everyone knew...

"All right. Fine. I love him. What do you want me to do about it?" Riza asked curtly. "He's not sure about the way he feels, and I don't blame him. He's been all over you for the past week."

Rain shook her head. "Not true. He always acted like he was in love with me in public, but the minute we were alone, it was all about you. I'm sure he didn't even realize he was doing it."

Riza waited for Rain to continue.

"Anyway, your troubles are resolved. I won't be here to bother you much longer," Rain remarked.

"What?"

"I've been transferred to South Central. I being here was just a transitional thing. Next week I'll be out of here," Rain said. "So I expect you to kiss and make up with Roy. _Literally_."

Riza almost blushed. Such physical contact had been on her mind for what seemed all day. Then something occurred to her. "Why do you care so much about Roy and I?" Riza asked.

Rain shrugged. "I don't know. I guess it's because I'm fond of Roy in my own way, and you two just make such a cute pair."

OOOOOOOOO

Riza and Rain chatted casually as they walked down the empty hallways on their way out. There was still a small amount of tension between them, but it was lessening every minute.

"So where did you get your name as the Blackwater Alchemist?" Riza asked.

"Because my alchemy focuses on liquids. I'm not sure where the 'black' part comes from though," Rain admitted. Suddenly she stopped walking, and laughed from embarrassment. "I'm such a clutz. I forgot something in my office. You can go without me, okay?"

"No, I can wait," Riza replied. Rain turned and started walking back, when she tripped over something—Riza certainly didn't see anything—and flailed—almost a little too obviously—and _accidentally _hit one of the office doors.

"Wow! I am a clutz!" Rain said as she recovered quickly and dashed down the hall. A second later, the door which Rain had hit opened. Riza was very skeptical that Rain had truly tripped when she realized that the door was Roy's.

"What was that?" Roy asked. "Who knocked--?" He glanced around and saw Riza.

"Sorry for the distraction sir," Riza apologized awkwardly. "Spitfire just...fell...on your door." Roy looked confused. Riza didn't blame him.

"Oh..." He looked around the hallway again. "Did I ever thank you for the...uh...flowers?"

"You mean the day lilies?" Riza asked. "Well, no."

Roy smiled wanly. "Thank you then."

"Anytime..."Riza felt the tension starting to return. She hoped Rain came back soon, to escape from the awkward situation. "Did you know that Spitfire is being transferred?"

"Really?" Roy nodded. "I'd heard something like that, yes..."

Neither met the other's eyes for a while, and neither said anything.

"You should get back to work, sir," Riza suggested. "It's late."

"Exactly," Roy smiled. "It's late. I was just about to leave anyway." He ducked into his office and shut off the lights, locked the door, and reappeared before Riza could walk away.

Riza figured she had been waiting for Rain for at least ten minutes now, and was starting to suspect that Rain hadn't intended on coming back—the fancy fall on his door had been entirely on purpose. Rain did want them to kiss and make up. Literally. Riza doubted that they would get to the kissing part.

"Hawkeye, there's something that's been bothering me," Roy said as she and he walked down the halls.

"Yes sir?"

"When I was reading your diary, I noticed that your hand-writing in a lot like mine...and I wondered why."

"Well sir, I do a lot of your paperwork, as I'm sure you know, and I've taught myself to write like you, so that I can sign those papers with 'your' signature. When I write my diary, I work on writing in your handwriting," Riza answered.

Roy stopped to look at her incredulously. "You do that for me? You spent all that time teaching yourself that for me?"

Riza turned and faced him. "Sir, I thought you'd have realized by now that I would do anything for you." They were outside the building now, standing on the desolate sidewalk.

"I still don't deserve it."

Riza did not reply.

"Ah...Hawkeye?"

"Sir?"

"Since Rain's leaving, I don't really have any excuse to get off work early. For a date, I mean. Maybe you and I could go get something to eat tomorrow night..."

"You'd rid yourself of Rain that quickly?" Riza asked sharply. "She hasn't even really left yet, and you're already trying to get someone else?"

"No, it's not like that!" Roy denied, worried that he was going to lose his chance with her. "I'm only trying to obey her last wishes. She came in and yelled at me after you and I had that talk...I thought she was going to kill me. She insisted that I 'kiss and make up' with you."

"That's what she told me too," Riza smirked. "It seems she's trying to play match-maker."

"So..." Roy said slyly, "It is your duty to follow her orders—she is your superior."

"I think we've already 'made up' as she said," Riza remarked innocently. Roy stepped close to her.

"And...?" Roy hinted. Riza couldn't believe she was in the same situation _again_. At this rate, she was going to end up actually kissing him. Not that she didn't want to, but...

But what? But it was forbidden? The fact that it was forbidden didn't stop the Elric brothers from doing human transmutation. But they had paid a horrendous price.

But this was a direct order from Colonel Rain Spitfire...and it was forbidden to disobey a direct order as well.

"And enjoy this," Riza whispered. "Because this is a one-time thing. For now."

"For now--!" Roy was about to say something in protest, but Riza didn't bother to let him. She had waited far too long for this.

OOOOOO

Rain looked out the window of her second-floor office. In the darkness of the night, she could just barely make out the two forms of Roy and Riza. Judging by the miniscule distance that separated them, they were obeying her orders. She smiled and twirled a piece of her auburn hair between her fingers. Now she could leave and know that she was finally released from orders she had received in the will of Brigadier General Hughes.

OOOOOO

A/N: There it is. I wrote this chapter over and over, and I still don't like it, but I had to get it done sometime. I think I deserve to be flamed for this one. So bring it on. Review.

And since this is the final installment, I'd like to thank all of my reviewers. I can't believe Igot so many reviews!You're all magnificent, I love you all, and I hope this story wasn't a complete waste of your time. I wish I could thank you individually, but that would go on forever. However, there is one I must mention.

**Zamnandi**- Wow. I can't believe you got all of that out of 'P-51'. I never would have thought of something that in-depth. That was awesome, and I wish I had thought of that. Wow.


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